Something Changed

November 07, 2013 5:50 PM

I left the school as soon as I realized that I won’t be okay alone, went home, and then left again. I just talked to someone who had been very special to me and I just thought that he could give me good mood because I’ve been very sad and crying since this morning. But something changed.

I won’t detail the scenario here because I still wanna protect the person’s identity. We talked, we laughed just like the old times, and then something has changed.

From teasing each other, we went to the crucial part, which are the serious matters between the two of us. He talked and explains everything that we should have tackled a long time ago. I remained silent, trying to keep my tears away. But as he goes farther, the emotion went down and ate me. I cried a lot. I was crying and I just have to hold me and explain again. It was very painful. The conversation was so sad. I really got hurt. He hugged me, kissed me and told me that we have to focus on what we have right now. He is already committed and very contented to his girl. I told him I am happy for them, but I know in my heart I don’t.

He was convincing me to fight and move forward. That past is past. I was still crying when he kissed and hugged me once more.

I left the place, I still the pain, yet I feel stronger after our conversation. I won’t deny that he help me to realize something, that something has changed. That I gotta go to what my life right now.

He will always be special to me. He was my best friend and my little brother before, and then turned to be my boyfriend in the year 2010. We’ve been separated for years, but I know he will stay concern to whatever’s happening to me.

To him, thank you so much for loving me then, for understanding and accepting the real me. Thank you for making me realize that love is wonderful. I love you always.

And by the way, if you have read this post, I will tell you that his name is John Vanielle Navato.